Just slow down.

A little over a year ago, I started running again. And no, it wasn't because I was being chased by anything. It was completely voluntary. I had always wanted to be a runner, but I struggled to stick with it. Cardio workouts weren't entirely foreign to me as had been a semi-avid cyclist for quite some time, but as life progressed I found that my time was increasingly at a premium. The days of donning the tights and shredding the streets were few and far between. This doesn't even factor in my growing concern over being turned into a road pizza thanks to the gross negligence of a probably-aspiring-TikTok-influencer attempting to wrangle a dump truck-sized SUV while chronicling what they had for breakfast to their 462 digital-disciples. I decided to get serious about giving running another fair shot.

My main issue with my other failed attempts was that I would run too much and too fast. I would become overwhelmed and humiliated by the desire to throw up on the sidewalk and die. This would last a week or two at most before I would give up. A friend of mine gave me some helpful advice:

Just slow down.

Just slow down? But... how was I supposed to convince my six (6) Strava followers that I was ELITE? How was I going to make it to the Olympics at the ripe old age of 36 by "sLoWiNg DoWn?" How was slowing down going to make me faster?

After accepting that I was in fact not ELITE and that I was not going to wield the Olympic torch with Snoop Dogg by my side at the 2028 Opening Ceremony, I decided it may be in my best interest, and in the best interest of my aging hamstrings, to simply slow the heck down.

I would say that I was surprised to learn that this actually worked, but honestly I knew that it would. I just lacked the patience and the desire to actually put in the work to get to where I wanted to be.

This probably goes with out saying, but slowing down can apply to so many other aspects of life and work as well. You know this, and I know this. While it seems obvious, I am horrible at actually putting this into practice. We read the headlines, we panic, we jump to conclusions... or at least I do. Maybe its justified in some cases, or maybe we'd be better off slowing down, thinking things through, and figuring out how to proceed in a more structured and productive manner. Or maybe we get so consumed with work that it distracts us from things that really matter like family, friends, helping someone in need, or even taking some time for ourselves.

As a photographer who shoots weddings, I often feel rushed, but I am constantly having to remind myself that I don't really need to be. Sure, weddings can be fast-paced, maybe even chaotic, but I do my best work when I stay present in the moment and focus on the things that I can control. In other words, when I slow down.

This is why I try to encourage couples that I work with to not be so strcitly glued to a timeline on an Excel spreadsheet. You only get one shot at this, so take it all in. Enjoy it. Focus on having the best time possible with your friends and family, and let me take care of the rest. Leave space for the day to unfold. Maybe you don't actually need photos in that location when we already made photos over here. Maybe you don't actually need to recreate that photo you found on Pinterest when you could be at cocktail hour creating your own unique memories with your loved ones. This isn't to say that you can't do those things, but rather to make sure you carefully think through how you want to spend the day.

In our fast-paced capitalistic hellscape of a society, slowing down is a form of resistance. The wedding industry certainly isn't immune to this either. This industry will try to tell you that you need it all in an effort to extract as much as they can fom you, but maybe you don't. Just slow down, think through what matters most to you, and let the magic happen.

Circling back to running, I've been able to run faster and further than I had ever imagined since I simply took the advice to slow down. Speed actually came naturally to me once I was better able to handle it. I ran my first half marathon in under two hours last month, and if you had asked me a year ago I would have told you that it would be 100% impossible for me to finish a half marathon in any amount of time. I hope the running analogy doesn't seem like too much of a stretch here, but to me its emblematic of the success we can expererience when we resist the urge to go as fast as the world around us is telling us to go.

It's easier said than done at times, but I am trying to apply this same form of resistance to other areas of my life, too. Maybe I'll even consider a full marathon at some point.